Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Day - 9
Jim is now moved into his lovely high rise hospital room. The walls are a lovely shade of drab with a pumpkin orange wall behind his head. He does have a very nice view of the mountains. We hung pictures and sayings to make it feel a little more homey. Not such a bad decorating job for a hospital room.
They do a funny thing here with the days and count down until the day they give him the stem cells. So, today is -9. He will get radiation until day -4. Then days -3 and -2 are chemo days. -1 is a "day of rest" and then day 0 is his new b-day.
Jim had his first radiation treatment today. See above video. 1 down and five to go. Jim says it is a little hard to stand there in that contraption, but today he feels good so it was doable. He played his medal of honor music while he stood there. It reminds me a little of Disneyland because of the contraption, music and then they turn the lights off so all you see is the glowing breast plates. Sorry, didn't get that part on video. No one can be in the room while the radiation is going. They put the breast plates there to protect his lungs from the radiation. Jim says he feels like a Super Hero.
Tonight I am going home to be with the kids. Back tomorrow for another fun fulled day.
Today, JIM AND I ARE THANKFUL for glowing breast plates that protect his lungs.
Yea!
Monday, March 1, 2010
Today we are, I am sure you can't guess where. Yes, we are back at LDS Hospital. Today is the final preps for Jim's Hospitalization. He got another shot today and then we are waiting for him to get his Central Line placed. They do this in the OR with x-ray so they can see where to put it. It is a long line that goes directly to the heart. It can be left in a long time and has several ports, so they can run all of his meds through the line and also draw blood from it. For Jim it means he doesn't have to keep getting poked, which when you have Cancer, you get poked alot and your veins start to not like it very much. So, now we are just waiting for the procedure. They will take him back in an OR room, consciously sedate him, and place the line. Then we wait in a recovery room for a while and then go home. So, I get to sit here with my computer and blog.
Yesterday, was a good day. It was emotionally draining, but a good day. We didn't plan it this way, but it just so happened that Brendan spoke in church and Sarah and her friend sang. When it was all scheduled, we didn't know that it would be Jim's last church meeting for a while. Several family members read about Bren and Sarah on the blog so they came to hear. I teased Jim if he felt like it was "The Last Supper." It is hard to have so much attention drawn to us, but in the same breath it is very comforting to know that people love us and care about us. It was also nice for Jim to hear his son speak and daughter sing. After Dinner last night, Jim gave myself and the kids blessings. He had his last week. He also talked to the kids a little about what was to come.
You know it is interesting. No matter what challenges our family has faced, we have always been able to be positive through the experiences. It hasn't even been that hard to be positive most times. We just were. I have to say this time, we have had a hard time. Both Jim and I have felt pretty beaten down. We have had to dig deeper than we ever have. I have been getting worried because the hospitalization is coming right up and neither Jim or I have rallied so to speak. Even yesterday I didn't feel it. But today, I feel at peace and ready to start this battle. Jim even said he was going to try to find the "fun." He told me last night that "it's all going to be ok." I believe him. When he gets radiation he has to stand there the whole time. The staff told him they will let him pipe in whatever music he wants from his I-pod. He told me that tomorrow he thinks he is going to play the theme from "Medal of Honor" which is a battle game on X-box. I see his fight kicking back in. Spencer always says Jim is "an animal." I am starting to see the Animal again. I am so glad. He will need that animal.
My friend gave me and the kids a notebook last night. She said that in times of trial she finds it helpful to write down some things that you are thankful for. There is always something to be thankful for. So, I am going to write something everyday.
Today I AM THANKFUL that Jim has been able to fight this Cancer for five years. After a stage 4 diagnosis, ruptured spleen, 20 Chemo treatments, 2 relapses, 6 bone barrow biopsies (Ouch) and a failed autologous stem cell transplant, he is still here and willing to fight the fight. I am right here with him. There is no turning back now or giving up. We are here for the long haul.
Yesterday, was a good day. It was emotionally draining, but a good day. We didn't plan it this way, but it just so happened that Brendan spoke in church and Sarah and her friend sang. When it was all scheduled, we didn't know that it would be Jim's last church meeting for a while. Several family members read about Bren and Sarah on the blog so they came to hear. I teased Jim if he felt like it was "The Last Supper." It is hard to have so much attention drawn to us, but in the same breath it is very comforting to know that people love us and care about us. It was also nice for Jim to hear his son speak and daughter sing. After Dinner last night, Jim gave myself and the kids blessings. He had his last week. He also talked to the kids a little about what was to come.
You know it is interesting. No matter what challenges our family has faced, we have always been able to be positive through the experiences. It hasn't even been that hard to be positive most times. We just were. I have to say this time, we have had a hard time. Both Jim and I have felt pretty beaten down. We have had to dig deeper than we ever have. I have been getting worried because the hospitalization is coming right up and neither Jim or I have rallied so to speak. Even yesterday I didn't feel it. But today, I feel at peace and ready to start this battle. Jim even said he was going to try to find the "fun." He told me last night that "it's all going to be ok." I believe him. When he gets radiation he has to stand there the whole time. The staff told him they will let him pipe in whatever music he wants from his I-pod. He told me that tomorrow he thinks he is going to play the theme from "Medal of Honor" which is a battle game on X-box. I see his fight kicking back in. Spencer always says Jim is "an animal." I am starting to see the Animal again. I am so glad. He will need that animal.
My friend gave me and the kids a notebook last night. She said that in times of trial she finds it helpful to write down some things that you are thankful for. There is always something to be thankful for. So, I am going to write something everyday.
Today I AM THANKFUL that Jim has been able to fight this Cancer for five years. After a stage 4 diagnosis, ruptured spleen, 20 Chemo treatments, 2 relapses, 6 bone barrow biopsies (Ouch) and a failed autologous stem cell transplant, he is still here and willing to fight the fight. I am right here with him. There is no turning back now or giving up. We are here for the long haul.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
New Tattoos
Yesterday, Jim and I spent yet another fun fulled day at LDS Hospital. Jim was able to get 4 new tattoos. Two in the front, and two in the back. These are little black dot tattoos that will mark him for radiation. Just what he always wanted.
Yesterday was pretty freaky. We visited with the radiation people. He has never had radiation before. His first 6 days in the hospital, he will undergo about 30 minutes a day of high dose radiation. He has to stand there the whole time. The side effects are pretty scary and it will probably make him pretty sick.
We also met with the cardiologist. There was some concern if his heart would be strong enough to undergo the high dose chemo. For a minute there I thought we wouldn't be able to move forward. It's funny, how much we dread the procedure, but there was a moment of panic if the transplant was no longer an option. The Dr. put Jim on heart meds to "fortify" his heart and they will watch him closely in the hospital, but it is not a deal breaker.
So, Friday we go to LDS for a final family conference. Saturday, LDS for a shot, Sunday, LDS for a shot, Monday, LDS for a shot and Central Line placement. Tuesday, Jim enters his cave. It is hard to look forward to this as a positive thing, but I am trying to gear up so that I can bring him positive energy and pull him through this. I am going to go shopping today or tomorrow to get some pictures and homey things to put in his room. I asked him how he wanted me to decorate his room and he said that he wanted it to feel like home. So, I will do my best to bring a little bit of home to the small sterile environment. He did request a window this time, so we are hoping for a view. Last time his window had a view of a brick wall. Not a good thing when you cant go outside and rarely leave your room. I told him if there was no view I was going to get his Nephew John and his wife
Emily who are artists to paint him a window. Whatever it takes.
We have been thinking that we have an idea of what this will be like, but the Dr's tell us it is not even the same as before. It is a whole different ball game because of using a donor. Donor sounds so cold like it doesn't even come from a person. It is Evan, Jim's brother, who is giving his bone marrow. He is my parents age but has taken care of himself and is as healthy as a horse (whatever that means). Evan has the goods. Yea Evan. We Love You. I also know that it will be a comfort to Jim seeing his brother for a couple of days during this process.
Well, this is our last normal weekend together. A little sad. On Sunday, Brendan speaks in church and Sarah sings. This was not planned but will be nice since this is Jim's last Sunday for a while.
Pray for us. We know the power of prayer and need it.
Stay tuned. I will be keeping you posted and I am going to do some videos also.
Yesterday was pretty freaky. We visited with the radiation people. He has never had radiation before. His first 6 days in the hospital, he will undergo about 30 minutes a day of high dose radiation. He has to stand there the whole time. The side effects are pretty scary and it will probably make him pretty sick.
We also met with the cardiologist. There was some concern if his heart would be strong enough to undergo the high dose chemo. For a minute there I thought we wouldn't be able to move forward. It's funny, how much we dread the procedure, but there was a moment of panic if the transplant was no longer an option. The Dr. put Jim on heart meds to "fortify" his heart and they will watch him closely in the hospital, but it is not a deal breaker.
So, Friday we go to LDS for a final family conference. Saturday, LDS for a shot, Sunday, LDS for a shot, Monday, LDS for a shot and Central Line placement. Tuesday, Jim enters his cave. It is hard to look forward to this as a positive thing, but I am trying to gear up so that I can bring him positive energy and pull him through this. I am going to go shopping today or tomorrow to get some pictures and homey things to put in his room. I asked him how he wanted me to decorate his room and he said that he wanted it to feel like home. So, I will do my best to bring a little bit of home to the small sterile environment. He did request a window this time, so we are hoping for a view. Last time his window had a view of a brick wall. Not a good thing when you cant go outside and rarely leave your room. I told him if there was no view I was going to get his Nephew John and his wife
Emily who are artists to paint him a window. Whatever it takes.
We have been thinking that we have an idea of what this will be like, but the Dr's tell us it is not even the same as before. It is a whole different ball game because of using a donor. Donor sounds so cold like it doesn't even come from a person. It is Evan, Jim's brother, who is giving his bone marrow. He is my parents age but has taken care of himself and is as healthy as a horse (whatever that means). Evan has the goods. Yea Evan. We Love You. I also know that it will be a comfort to Jim seeing his brother for a couple of days during this process.
Well, this is our last normal weekend together. A little sad. On Sunday, Brendan speaks in church and Sarah sings. This was not planned but will be nice since this is Jim's last Sunday for a while.
Pray for us. We know the power of prayer and need it.
Stay tuned. I will be keeping you posted and I am going to do some videos also.
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